The profession of firefighting is a noble and well-respected one. Hence, it’s perfect that we can make them laugh with these hilarious firefighter jokes.
Many firemen dedicate their entire adult life to helping others and saving lives. The majority of firefighter humor is inspired by jokes concerning fire. Firetruck jokes, firehouse jokes, fire station jokes, hose jokes, and fire department jokes are all common. Then, we hope you find this collection of amusing firefighter jokes entertaining.
1. How to report impressively?
An excited man calls the fire department and says, “Help me, my house is on fire!!”
The fireman says, “Where do you live?”
The man replies, “I am too excited, I can’t tell you the exact address.” The fireman asks, “How do you expect us to get there?”
Then, the man replies, “What do you mean ‘how’? The big red truck.
2. It’s my coworker’s last day...
A coworker is leaving this weekend to become a firefighter. We’re throwing him a farewell party and want to have a funny pun written on the wall. Something like “seeing you leave really blows” but instead has it somehow relate to becoming a firefighter.
I know you guys can help us out. Thanks!
Have fun with: 20 Funny Firefighter Memes Can Appreciate.
3. The firefighter’s dog
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation dog. The children started discussing what the dog’s duties might be.
“They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster.
“No,” said another, “he’s just for good luck.”
A third child concluded. “No silly, they use the dogs to find the fire hydrant!”
4. Fire brigade joke
The Fire brigade phones George Graham in the early hours of Sunday morning. “Mr. Graham sir, White Hart Lane is on fire!”
“The cups man! Save the cups!” cries, George.
“Uh, the fire hasn’t spread to the canteen yet, sir.”
5. The quiz game
Q: What word begins with the letter “F” and ends in “UCK”?
A: FIRETRUCK.
Discover more: Top 50 Firefighter Slogans That Will Inspire You.
6. The story of the fallen wings
A fireman and a policeman die and both go to heaven where they are issued their wings with the warning that if they had even one bad thought that their wings would fall off. Everything was going fine for some time then one day they passed a very attractive young lady.
As the fireman turned to watch her pass his wings fell off. When he bent over to pick them up the policeman’s wings fell off.
7. Fire Chief joke
A fire chief died and went to heaven. When he got there he saw a long line waiting to get into the pearly gates.
He told himself, “I am a fire chief, I’m not going to wait in line.”
He went to the angels guarding the gates and said, “Let me in, I’m a fire chief.”
The angels replied, “You’ll have to wait in line like everyone else, sir.” While waiting at the back of the line he saw a sedan pull up with red lights and a man got out wearing a white helmet that said “CHIEF.” The angels popped to attention and let the chief enter heaven. The waiting fire chief was really upset now and went to talk to the angels.
He asked, “Why did you let that fire chief go through and not me?” To which the angels replied, “You have it all wrong, sir. That’s GOD, he just thinks he’s a fire chief.”
8. Protect the new garden
A guy calls the fire department and says, “I’ve just had my front yard landscaped, I have a nice new flower bed, a new fish pond with a fountain, and a new rose garden.”
“Very nice,” the firefighter replies, “but what does that have to do with the fire service?”
“Well,” the man answers, “the house next door is on fire and I don’t want you to trample my front yard.”
9. Long firemen joke
A paramedic, firefighter, and a police officer are all on a game show and the host asks the question,
“Who can count to ten?” The paramedic rings in first and states, “That’s an easy one, 1-2-3-4-5-BREATH, 1-2-3-4-5-BREATH.”
“No, I’m sorry, that’s wrong,” the game host says, “Anyone else?”
The police officer rings in stating that everyone knows how to count to ten, “1-2-3-4-5-6-RELOAD, 1-2-3-4-5-6-RELOAD.”
“No, nice try though. How about you sir? Do firefighters know how to count to ten?”
“Sure,” he says, “1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10.”
“Very good!” says the host, “Now, can you count any farther?”
“Of course, I can…much farther,” the firefighter replies.
“1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-Jack-Queen-King-Ace.”
10. The story of a bar
A bar is burning to the ground, and a team of firefighters rushes in to put it out.
A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rushes in to put out the fire. When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. They drag him out of the bar and eventually, the Irishman comes to.
The firefighter says “you were there, how did this whole thing get started?!”
Then, the Irishman responds “I don’t know it was burning when I walked in”.
11. My coworkers and I were sent to “sensitivity training”
The lady running it said, “you have to use the right words to refer to people because you don’t want to offend them. Instead of ‘policeman’, say ‘police officer’. Instead of ‘fireman’ say ‘firefighter’. Don’t say ‘chairman’, say ‘chairperson’.”
“Um, excuse me,” I said, “I think they prefer to be called people with disabilities.”
12. My job
They say if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen…
Which is why I lost my job as a firefighter.
13. Firefighter jokes for kids
Q: Do firefighters have to train to jump higher than a fire hydrant?
A: No, because everyone can jump higher than a fire hydrant (fire hydrants can’t jump).
Q: What do firefighters surf with?
A: Firefox.
14. Christmas firefighter joke
At this time of year, there’s nothing I love more than sitting in front of a warm fire, mulled wine in hand, singing Christmas songs until I slowly fall asleep. And that’s why I’m no longer a firefighter.
15. Chief firemen joke
Why doesn’t a fire chief look out the window in the morning?
Because then he wouldn’t have anything to do in the afternoon.
16. Do the volunteer
A mathematician wants more excitement and wants to become a volunteer fireman on the weekends
He goes through the training and proceeds to take the written final exam.
Question 1: You come across a car that is flipped upside down and on fire with the driver still in it. What do you do?
The mathematician answers with the steps he was taught in training.
Question 2: You come across a car that is flipped upside down with the driver still in it. What do you do?
The mathematician answers, Set the car on fire. Finally, it is a solved problem.
17. “Havana”
A fire chief came home early one day and finds his wife relaxing in bed. All looks well till he notices a cigar in the ashtray. He becomes furious and yells, “Where did that cigar come from?”
After that, a voice from under the bed says, “Havana!”
18. Also “fast”
All of the firefighters at my station are quick. They’re even “fast” asleep!
19. A place got lit on fire
The firefighters were too late to reach and put it out. Media arrived as well to which one of the firefighters giving report said,
“I’ve got good news and bad news, the bad news is, 41 children died in that fire. But the good news is it was an orphanage, so I have no parents to notify”.
20. A cop, a firefighter, and a bureaucrat
A cop, a firefighter, and a bureaucrat are at an elementary school career day. The cop brags I’m the fastest one out of the three. I can respond to a threat in one minute
Then, the firefighter says “That’s nothing, I can run into a burning building and rescue someone in 30 seconds”.
The bureaucrat responds, pfff, I can work 9-5 and be home by 2.
21. “How do I get a Party card?”
A Minsk fireman gets home from work and says to his wife, “They told me that tomorrow I either go to Chernobyl or hand in my Party card.”
“But you’re not in the party,” she replies.
“Right, so I’m wondering how do I get a Party card by tomorrow morning?”.
22. Roleplay
My wife said to me, “Can we do some role play?”
I said, “Ok yeah. What do you suggest?”
She said, “Firefighter to the rescue.” I wish she’d hurry up. I’ve been stuck up this tree dressed as a cat for twelve hours now.
23. How to leave in an orderly fashion?
A blonde was checked into the hospital when a fire broke out. The entire hospital was being evacuated. As the fire spread, a fireman was checking for stragglers when he found the blonde choking on smoke while pulling on a nurse’s assistant’s gown. Then, the fireman grabbed the blonde and took her outside as the building began to collapse.
As soon as they were safe, the fireman scolded her for staying inside.
Fireman – “Ma’am, why were you putting on a nurse’s gown? You could have died!”
Blonde – “I wanted to leave, but the doctor kept yelling at everyone to leave in an orderly fashion, and this is all I could find!”
24. His career
Girl in the bar: “What do you do for a living?”
Then, the firefighter replies: “I make the six o’clock news.”
25. Work from home
It’s always good to find out you’re going to be working from home. Unless you’re a firefighter.
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In conclusion, there are the top 25 firefighter jokes that make you laugh out loud in seconds. I hope you find this article amusing and entertaining. Wishing our heroes good health, positive and happiness to strive for the sake of the entire country.
Besides, you may like: 45 Best Firefighter Retirement Quotes For Firefighters.
